As we begin our work together, I will first ask what brings you in right now, what is happening in your life and relationships that inspired you to want this counseling for yourself.
As we walk through the presenting issue’s I will also ask you for some history from your life. We will explore your family tree, your social life, your work life, your relationships and look for patterns of behaviors and feelings that may show themselves. We will look to see if there are issues from the past, be it distant or recent that are impacting your life today.
I will look to understand the nature of your relationships with others and ultimately with yourself and to help you work through the issues that we uncover.
We will work on healing some of the old issues, or past traumas, explore relationship dynamics from your family of origin and open up to what you are repeating in your current day relationships.
Look at ways that you think, believe and behave that get in the way of your happiness.
In therapy we look at the ways that we think and how to make changes in our thinking that will help us to live happier in our selves. We also look to explore behaviors and how they impact us and others and to make changes in that as well.
What I know to be true is that we react to the world and the people in it based on what we think and believe. If I believe that you hurt me, then I will live in the pain of that hurt, but if I believe that you did something accidentally instead of on purpose that hurt me, then I have room to live differently in my feelings.
Learn to stop telling stories. We decide a lot about other people and we tell ourselves stories and interpret incidences based on who we are and what we believe. I will help you to expand your thinking and beliefs to stop deciding what other people’s intentions are, what the meaning of their behavior is and to find a way to live more freely and openly in an expanded truth.
I will help you to know more about how you assume and mind read and instead help you learn how to ask for information and ask for the other person’s reality so that you can respond based on not just who you are but also who the other person is and what they are telling you about themselves to be true.
Less judgment, more curiosity.
Invite less judgement and more curiosity to your whole experience of the world and it will be a better place to live. We usually judge others because we are judging ourselves, when we can live in less judgement of ourselves, have more curiosity about ourselves and others, we will have more freedom and joy.
Our Judgements are also a way to mask feelings that we are having, feelings like fear or anger or hurt. When we develop the ability to look more thoroughly at ourselves, our patterns, our way of thinking, how we have access to our feelings and beliefs, then we can begin to live a better life and grow into the person we are meant to be. We can heal from our past. We can live in less pain. We can learn to live differently and feel more completely. We can know ourselves, and in that we can be free.